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It's been three years since I started this blog!  Since Ben and Sophie do so much together now, I've decided to create a new blog this summer that I'll use to share news about our family in general, for those who may be interested.  It will, of course, mostly be about the kids since they're the most interesting and they can't tell their own stories yet.

But one more post just about my little girl, for old times' sake.  If you're an avid reader of this blog, I've probably already talked to you about the following issue.  Soon after Sophie's birthday, John came across an article about something called hyperlexia.  Hyperlexia is a condition that is sometimes placed on the autism spectrum, but often it's not -- it just seems to depend on the child.  It caught our attention because many of the indicators sounded very, very familiar to us: extremely early reading and surprising memorization skills, speaking only in repetition, rarely asking questions or initiating social interaction, rigid attachment to routines and patterns, lack of interest in other children, physical sensitivities and/or strange fears.

Around the same time, Ben had started talking and I was noticing that he was already expressing himself in ways that Sophie still didn't seem able to.  We also had some opportunities to interact with other children who are very close to Sophie in age or even younger, and I constantly heard them saying things to people that I couldn't even imagine Sophie saying.

My initial reaction was anxiety about whether there is really something wrong with her.  But it wasn't difficult to put my mind to rest.

1. She clearly understands meaning.  Some hyperlexic children can "read" but they don't really understand what the words mean, and I am certain that Sophie does.  She also knows what we're saying to her.  And her ability to understand is only moving forward.
2. Although she isn't the most affectionate child you'll ever meet, most of her behavior is still pretty prosocial.  She likes to hug and kiss in moderation, she enjoys telling jokes and being silly with us, she's usually very helpful and obedient, and she's interacting more and more (in positive ways) with her little brother: talking to him, playing with him, helping him do things, sharing toys with him even if she technically has the rights to them.
3. In the two months since we realized that Sophie is noticeably different from other kids her age, she's finally started using correct pronouns (referring to herself as "I" instead of echoing the "you" that we call her), we've heard her come up with significantly more original speech (though the overall level is still pretty low), and just today she finally asked me a "wh" question for the first time: "what's that, Mama?"  She has never asked me anything before, other than "can I have some [food]?"

Anyway, we have an appointment with a child psychologist on Monday.  Ever since I made the appointment, I've been rehearsing an answer to the question: "why are you here?"  My main concern is that Sophie does not seem able to express herself the way other kids her age can.  I may be wrong about this, so I guess finding that out is one reason we're going.  I'm not worried about Sophie's reading level or her penchant for memorization, unless they are somehow inhibiting her potential for original thought and expression.  But I'm especially concerned about her communication skills because we're about to put her in other people's care full-time, five days a week.  I want to understand what her needs are so that I can convey them to her teachers, who will have 17 other kids to pay attention to and might very easily overlook the girl who never says anything or seeks attention, at a time when she most needs to be engaged.

I just hope I can explain this to the doctor.  I was a little bit frustrated when I brought this up with Sophie's regular doctor and, while he listened politely, he said "I have to say she seems fine."  He had never talked to her!  Or rather, he had never heard her talk.  I don't think she has any major psychological issues that would be evident in a five-minute visit that happens once a year.  He was probably just trying to be reassuring, though, and he gave us the referral anyway.

So recently, we've been trying to engage Sophie even more than before.  We've tried to get her to focus less on memorization activities and more on social interactions, and I think it's helping her.  As part of that effort, I signed Sophie up for a short session of ballet classes this month.  In May, we went to a spring performance put on by one of the studios in town, and Sophie's eyes were glued to the stage for an entire 90 minutes.  (Find me another 3-year-old who would do that!)  Afterward I asked her if she would like to be a ballerina like the ones we saw, and she said yes.  So we bought her a leotard, tights, and slippers and enrolled her in a class.

It's been a small adventure.  For one thing, the timing is unfortunate: her class is on the same days that John and I normally have track workouts/meets, so those days seem extra busy.  It's also during rush hour and the time that I would usually make dinner, so that's messed us up a little bit too.  But we're making it work and having fun.  When we arrived for the first one, Sophie was bouncing off the walls.  She is never that kid.  But she stayed in her own world for quite a while, running around the studio singing to herself while all the other kids sat in a circle and listened to their teacher.  As the parent, you want to jump in there and give her some direction and/or get her to stop distracting everyone, but the teacher made it pretty clear that she was more comfortable handling the kids without parental intervention.

By the end of the first class, I think Sophie basically figured out what's expected.  I can't know for sure because they keep the door closed and the blinds shut so parents can't see in!  But there is a little crack between the blinds and the windowpane where you might catch a glimpse of your kid in the mirror, and the couple of times I've been able to see Sophie, she's following directions and having a good time.  Seeing her do things in the world on her own, without me, makes me completely giddy!  She is blossoming, and nothing has ever made me happier than being able to witness that.